Take a sharp knife and make criss-crosses in the fat of the steak, then season it up. Ideally do this the night before.

Set your BBQ up for two-zone grilling and get the grill raging hot. Oil up your grill grate, then place the steak fat side down directly on the grill. Let the fat render for a good four to five minutes, watching it doesn’t burn.

Once you have some good colour on the fat, it’s time to lay the steak on its side. Keep it moving around, building up that crust, then flip it after two to three minutes and baste it. Repeat this process until you’ve built up colour and crust all over your steak.

When you’re happy with the crust, move the steak over to the cooler side of the grill, keeping the fat pointed towards the heat. Let the steak finish off slowly – you want to be taking your rump off the grill around the 52–54C internal temperature mark. Remove and leave to rest while you make the anchovy hollandaise.

Add the egg yolks, anchovies, garlic and lemon juice to a food processor and blitz to create a paste. Now slowly trickle in the melted butter with the processor still whizzing. This should give you a beautifully thick and creamy hollandaise.

Serve the rump and sauce alongside a roasted tomato and mushroom, and chips. For extra dad points, play Phil Collins mega loud, have it with a can of your favourite beer and fall asleep in your chair after.

For the stuffing, fry the onion in the pork or beef fat with the salt to help it soften. After about five minutes, add the garlic and dried herbs. Cook for another 10–15 minutes to caramelise the onions, then add the garlic granules, onion granules, black pepper and the panko. Stir well so the breadcrumbs absorb the flavour. Pour in the chicken stock and stir. The breadcrumbs should drink up all the liquid. Remove from the heat and cool completely in the fridge.

Lay out the pork belly, meat side up. Season all over with SPG and any extra herbs. Add the stuffing, pushing it into every nook and cranny. Roll the pork up tightly and secure at intervals with butcher’s string.

To prep the skin, place a rack in the bottom of your sink with the plug removed. Slowly pour a full kettle of boiling water over the skin. You will see it tighten and change colour instantly. This helps blistering later. Pat the skin dry. Crush some smoked rock salt to a fine powder and rub it liberally all over the skin. Place the pork on a rack in the fridge, uncovered, overnight to dry the skin out fully.

When ready to cook, set your BBQ up for rotisserie cooking. Load the spit with the pork and place it on the BBQ with the coals pushed to the edges and a tray underneath to catch drippings. Add your briquettes, lumpwood, or a mix, and put the lid on.

Your BBQ will start around 200C but will naturally settle around 150C. Try to maintain it there. Check the internal temperature throughout; you are looking for around 93C. At this point (after five to six hours) the pork should be fall-apart tender with crispy crackling.

If the crackling has not fully puffed, move the coal baskets directly underneath the pork or as close to the skin as possible. You may need to switch the rotisserie off and let the skin sit next to the heat, but watch it like a hawk. For stubborn patches, grab a red-hot coal with your tongs and hold it near the skin to finish the job.

Top Tip

To make a hog roast roll: chop up the pork stuffing and crackling, whack it in a bun with our smoked apple butter.

Tomato first. Get your tomato on before anything else. Cut it in half, season with SPG, the thyme leaves and oil. Put it high up on the BBQ so it gets a slow roast over direct heat, turning it over halfway through so it gets some good colour on both sides.

For the carrots, follow the instructions below.

Cook the courgette and aubergine. Slice your courgette and aubergine about one centimetre thick, toss in oil, SPG and a squeeze of lemon juice. Get them over direct heat, close enough to the coals that you can’t hold your hand there for longer than two seconds without shouting an expletive. The goal is to get a good char and cook them past the rubbery stage, especially the aubergine. Once ready, move them somewhere on the BBQ to keep warm.

Cook the rest of your veg. Toss the broccoli, beans and spring onions in oil, SPG and lemon juice. Get the veg on the grill! The broccoli will take the longest. You’re looking for everything to have a nice bit of char on the outside and to be beautifully tender; as soon as you can get a fork through the veg easily, it’s done.

Make the red pepper dip and the lemon pepper mayo as per the instructions below.

Assemble. Once everything is cooked, lay the veg out on a tray with the dips. Get stuck in and use the dips to give your grilled veg that extra flavour kick.

Add the carrots, salt, sugar, star anise and butter to a pan of water and bring to the boil. Turn down to a simmer and cook until you can just about stick a fork through them. Drain and allow the carrots to cool.

Set your BBQ up for direct grilling. Oil the carrots lightly and add a small amount of SPG (they will already be seasoned from the first cook). Place the carrots on the hot grill, turning every two to three minutes until they take on a bit of char.

As soon as you start getting a nice bit of colour, baste with the maple syrup. Keep cooking, allowing the maple glaze to caramelise and stick to the carrots. Once nicely glazed, remove from the grill, top with crushed hazelnuts for a bit of texture, and, if you really want, add an extra drizzle of maple syrup to the serving dish.